Transformers: Age of Extinction (2014)

Optimus Prime finally rides a robot dinosaur into battle, and Michael Bay makes you sit through most of a very long movie to get there. Age of Extinction runs 165 minutes and feels like a director’s cut nobody asked for. Mark Wahlberg plays a struggling inventor in Texas who mostly invents new ways to shout at his daughter’s boyfriend. When he isn’t doing that, he’s shouting at robots. Stanley Tucci is the only person who seems to know what movie he’s in, playing a tech boss who panics in a gloriously high-pitched way. Kelsey Grammer glowers. The Autobots barely have personalities left, and the product placement has its own subplot energy. The Hong Kong finale does deliver some big, loud spectacle, if your ears survive. Critics gave it 18% on Rotten Tomatoes, and it still pulled $1.1 billion worldwide, so here we are. A 3.6 because one robot dinosaur doesn’t buy back 165 minutes. $1,178 says you spot an old truck at a yard sale this week and quietly check it for an Autobot logo.

What works: The Dinobots finally show up, Stanley Tucci is having a blast, and a few of the Hong Kong set pieces are big, loud spectacle.

What doesn’t: It runs 165 minutes, the human characters spend most of it yelling, and the Autobots have barely any personality left.

Who it’s for: Robot fans who only care about the fights and don’t mind skipping through everything in between.