War Dogs (2016)

Todd Phillips really wants War Dogs to be a Martin Scorsese movie. There’s the cocky voiceover, the chapter cards, and the rise and fall of two guys who should never have been trusted with a stapler, let alone a weapons contract. It never gets there, because Miles Teller’s David narrates his own life like he’s mildly surprised by it, and Ana de Armas is stuck on the phone being worried. The real reason to watch is Jonah Hill. His Efraim is a fast talker with a high, strange laugh that sounds like a car alarm in a good mood, and every time he lies, you half believe him too. The best stretch is a sweaty truck run across the desert into Iraq, where the jokes stop and the danger feels real. Bradley Cooper pops in as a quiet, shady dealer and owns his handful of scenes. A 6.1 because Hill is a blast and the movie is a copy of better ones. $46.23 says you try Jonah Hill’s laugh on somebody this week and they ask if you’re okay.

What works: Jonah Hill is funny and a little frightening as Efraim, and the desert truck run into Iraq is genuinely tense.

What doesn’t: It borrows its whole style from better crime movies, and Miles Teller’s narrator is too bland to carry the story.

Who it’s for: People who love true stories about young guys getting in way over their heads, and anyone who enjoys watching Jonah Hill talk his way out of everything.